I came to know Christ when I was a senior in high school. I had a religious upbringing but in reality it was just that. . . religious. I didn’t understand what it meant to have Christ as the Master of my life. While in high school I began attending the youth group at my friend’s church. The youth pastor taught in a way I had never heard before. Through his powerful teaching I learned what it meant to die to self and allow Christ to live in and through me. I knew that was what was missing, and I surrendered my life to Christ. Through college I continued to grow in my walk. However, it was when God took me out of my comfort zone and moved me to a new location alone that the growing process truly began. I had read several of the books by Eric and Leslie and knew that this was what life was supposed to look like. My first year living and teaching elementary school in a small town was the year that I grew by leaps and bounds. I was all alone with Christ and He used that year to teach me dependence in Him alone. I have had my ups and downs in my walk since that time. However, as I mature in my walk, I learn how truly valuable it is to give up our lives and allow Him to reign in us.

       The town that I teach in is a very low-income, broken town. Many of my students throughout the years have come from dysfunctional families with extreme problems. Throughout the years here I have cried many tears over students because I felt so helpless to do anything for them. For years I have dreamed of being an adoptive parent, but I had no idea what God would truly ask of me in this area. I thought I

would adopt beautiful babies from around the world and have one big multi-cultural family. Several years ago, I began looking into overseas adoption. My heart sank as I looked at all of the restrictions and the financial cost of overseas adoption. Because of my age and status as a single woman, I did not qualify for the countries I looked at.  And as a new teacher, I could not afford overseas adoption.

        As I continued to teach elementary school and grieve over the lives of the students in my class, I would yearn to provide them with a better home. My mother has always told me that there are so many children right here in America that need loving homes.  I began to see how true that was.  I decided to look into local adoptions. Honestly, I felt that it would lead to a dead-end. I figured that I would have to be married and of a certain age, just like the overseas adoptions had required. A friend of mine had adopted children from our hometown so I began asking her about it. Two of her children had been adopted through the foster care system and she told me that I more than qualified to do the same.

            So…2 1/2 years ago, I got the application to become a foster parent but I never filled it out. I was working two jobs at the time and spending the weekends with my grandmother 80 miles away so I could not commit to a child. Then, a year and a half ago, my grandmother passed away and I quit the second job. God challenged me to step out, just like Moses. He asked me what other excuses I had to give. I had NONE. Last spring, I enrolled in the classes, finished the application and received my license in July. Nine days later I got a call, asking if I would become a foster parent to an eleven-year-old boy.  It was a completely different scenario than I’d always envisioned, but I knew God was telling me to say “yes!”  My first foster child, Justin, came to live with me, and my life has radically changed.

How did you come to know Christ and choose to live a set-apart life?

        I am challenged every single moment of every single day. I have quickly learned what it means to truly die to self. Foster children are not your typical children. They have experienced more horror in their young lives than possibly 10 adults do in a lifetime. They are broken, hurting children and they desperately need the love and joy that every child should have. They enter your home with baggage, pain, and anger. This causes them to act out towards anyone and everyone at times. Through it all, Christ says, “These are My children. Please take care of them.” I have had to give up many dreams that every parent has of raising lovely, angelic children who adore you. God has asked me to take care of “the least of these” and that is what I plan on doing for the rest of my life. This means that many children will enter my home—some will stay permanently, (Justin, my current foster child will more than likely become my adopted son) others will be reunited with their families and I will have the privilege of ministering to them for a season of their lives.

        Through it all, God will use me to teach them about our life-altering God. It is my hope that every hug, every kind word, every prayer spoken over each child He brings into my life will eventually lead them to our Father. The biggest challenge He has given me has come recently. God gave me some valuable words spoken by Jackie Pullinger: “When you hear of a need, you must realize that you might be the only one who can fill that need.” Prior to hearing those words I had a certain quota a child must meet: namely, very few challenging behaviors. However, after hearing those words I know that I will NEVER be able to turn down a child, no matter how difficult they may be and how much they may disrupt my

peaceful life. God knows what He is doing and I may just be the one and only person who can turn that child’s life around. I could never give up changing a life for the Lord who has so radically changed mine.

        The greatest challenge has been learning to parent in a different way. Because these children are not “typical” children, they cannot be parented using “typical” parenting techniques. Every negative behavior is a cry for help and they don’t know how to vocalize their needs. There are many times I have felt frustrated to the point of breaking but I have learned to simply love. At times when my patience has run out and I feel like I will fall apart, I simply reach out with a hug and a shoulder to cry on.

        My biggest fear in this adventure is the fear of the unknown. I never know what the children will be like. You receive a phone call for a kiddo and you have two choices- yes or no. There is not a lot of information on the children and you have to have faith that God will take care of you.

        I remember getting the call for my current son and driving to pick him up. Fear and panic gripped my heart and I wondered, “What in the world am I doing????” I wanted to turn around and run back to my peacefully, BORING life, but there was no turning back. God will provide the strength and He has.

My foster son, Justin, is my pride and joy. I have cried many tears over how blessed I am to have him in my life. It feels as though he has always been in my life. Justin is a bubbly, cheerful

When and how did God begin opening your eyes to the needs of children in the foster system?

In what ways have you been challenged and stretched through this process?

What were your greatest struggles and fears in opening your life to foster children?

13-year old. He can be a complete gem one moment, and make me crazy the next, but through it all I love him!! He has brought so much joy to my life and we are two peas in a pod. God knew what He was doing! There are days when I think about the peaceful home I once had, but I am quickly reminded how boring it was. There is no boredom now! Each day is a new adventure and I wake up each morning excited for what it will bring. Justin has taught me so much in the 7 months he has lived with me. He has taught me how to love unconditionally, how to seek forgiveness when necessary (I am not a perfect parent), how to have an ENDLESS supply of patience, and how to have joy over the simple things in life. I will begin the adoption process for him in a few short months and I look forward to calling him my son.

      He has also dramatically altered my relationship with Christ. Sometimes when life is “typical” it is easy to rely less on God for our strength and more on ourselves. But, when you turn your life upside down, you quickly learn how inadequate you actually are. I could NEVER do this if God was not actually doing it through me. It is way too big for me to do. He shows me that each and every day, but He also provides the strength to live out each day in a way that changes Justin’s life.  Through this experience I have drawn closer to Christ as the Provider for ALL. He has to be the One to provide me with the energy, the patience, the love, the wisdom, and the peace to do this.

           Many people think it is quite odd and some disagree with my decision to adopt because I am a single parent. However, as I draw nearer to Christ, all I can hear is Him saying, “This is My child. Please take care of him.” I have to be more

Tell us about your foster son.  How has he changed your life and your relationship with God?

concerned with what my Lord says than what the world around me thinks. This may even mean dying to dreams that I have once had, but for Christ, it is worth it all.
        My decision to become a foster/adoptive parent has shown me incredible things about the people around me. I must honestly say that I could not do this without the support and love of the people in my life. I am not raising this child alone. My church family, my biological family, and my friends all play an active role in raising Justin.

         When I made it clear that I plan on adopting Justin once he becomes legally free for adoption, many people in my life were concerned. Many people worry that I am messing up my future by taking on a child. To them, I am a successful,bright, 26-year old with a fantastic future ahead of me. They worry that adopting Justin will take away my chances for marriage and “true” happiness. I do not buy into this whole logic. Christ never promised me marriage. He promised that if I am obedient to Him, He will bless me. Yes…I do desire marriage. However, above all things, I desire to please my Lord and be obedient to Him in ALL things. He has called me to take care of the “least of these” and in return He will take care of me. I have a FANTASTIC future ahead of me and I cannot wait to see what He has in store for me. I believe it will be beautifully unpredictable and I will love every

How have others responded to your decision?

minute of it!

       Listen to Christ and act in obedience. It was when we were broken and lost that Christ reached out and set us free. He is calling us to do the same for these children. They are broken and lost and He wants us to reach out, wrap them in our arms, and set them free from the lives they are living. Do not be afraid. When we act in obedience He provides us with everything we need to do His will. He will not call us into something big and then leave us to do it on our own. He wants to showcase His power through our lives and He simply needs willing participants.

        We are at the prime of our lives for changing the world through foster care and adoption. God’s Word says, “The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit.” 1 Corinthians 7:34. As single women we have been given a great gift! 

We have nothing holding us back from changing the world for Christ! I am an ordinary girl who is allowing the Lord to do extraordinary things through me and every other single girl out there has the same potential. Take that step of faith and watch the blessings flow!

        I urge each and everyone reading this to pray about foster care/adoption. The Lord is pleading for us to take care of His children.

       If you are interested, contact your local Child and Family Services Division. The phone number is found in the government section of the phone book. Every state has different requirements but they can lead you in the right direction. If you simply want to hash out the details or get more information, please feel free to contact me at: snowqueen22@hotmail.com. I would love to cheer you on in changing the world, one life at a time!  *

What would be your advice to other single young women who are contemplating foster care or adoption of children in need?

Where can people go to find out more about helping children in the foster system?